It just seems to be a very long week.  I think I said yesterday that it was dragging a long like a fat bag of bricks! No joke!  It has just been one of those weeks.  My ability to procrastinate with certain things seems to be beating me at the moment.  I really need to get it in gear.  I need to get my  house cleaned.  I need to get the weeds taken care of under the porch before they consume me.  I need to find a way to clear my mind, to relax, to just be.  I need a BREAK!  I feel like I have just has so much going on.  I actually overslept Monday morning...this is simply not something I do.  I don't recall the last time I had a decent night's sleep but if I had to guess it might have happened then, had I not had to get up of course.  I find myself lately forgetting things or overlooking simple things, this is not my nature.  I don't forget anything and I am overly observant.  I don't feel like I have been lately though. 

I always seem to have a million different things on my mind.  Some things stick and some slowly, over time fall away. Gotta clear my mind.

I read this and it just seems to be resonating with me right now for whatever reason.

Sometimes you have to say no to the good,

so that you can say yes to the better

~ thanks for that amylee

So we are approaching a holiday and in typical, spoiled, unappreciative fashion this individual I often speak of is already complaining about what they will or will not be getting for Mother's day.  I mean good lord, give it a rest already.  Someone said "Hell, what's it matter, no matter what he gets you he will be in trouble. It is either not enough or too much or not the right 'fit' or too cheap or to expensive."  LMAO!  I don't think she took too much to that but seriously that is exactly what it is.  I get so tired or such ungrateful asses.  With all that has happened these past couple weeks, with people in our own community that have lost everything they own, some have lost loved ones and you are really going to continue to be such a pompous ass.  WOW....It just never ceases to amaze me, the behavior of others who seem to live in their own little world.  I mean really, The Truman Show was just a movie.  The world simply just does not revolve solely around you. Of course these are also the types of people that when something goes wrong in "their world" they expect everyone to stop, drop everything and devote themselves to them.  Not going to happen.

Maybe SHE should take a moment to look at the images below.  20 minutes or so from where we live and work.  Yes we have dented cars, cracked/broken glass, tress and shrubs that had seen better days but come on, you can't look at these images and really tell me any of us have a damn right to be complaining about material things in life. 

Camp Creek Community in Greene County Tennessee.

 

"It is not the strongest of the species that survives, 

nor the most intelligent that survives. 

It is the one that is the most adaptable to change"

~ Charles Darwin

So....I have been OK about updating but not great.  I will continue to improve on that.  There has been SO much going on lately.  Let's see, the weekend of April 9th Starla and I took off on another one of our mini road trips.  We always make it home before the day ends but often get lost a number of times along the way.  That is part of what makes it so fun.  We venture off somewhere new and always see something a little scary and something amazingly beautiful it seems.  We have a good time though rain or shine.  We ended up making a huge day of it and went all sorts of places and found all sorts of "new" places.  New to us at least.  We finished off in Johnson City with dinner and then started our drive home.  It was supposed to have stormed all day but ended up being sunny and beautiful.  Just as we were headed out the rain started.  Just as we entered the Green Co line on I81 there was a tornado warning over the radio and about that same moment we started getting pounded by hail the size of golf balls and even bigger.  Needless to say it made the almost full hour that we sat there, moving no further than maybe a quarter mile if that - VERY LONG!  Let me just say, the abrupt Tornado Warnings is not something that happens around here.  When it does, it usually doesn't end well.  I guess we can say that is one down fall of living in these beautiful mountains!  It was not fun for sure!  When all was said and done and when the reports from Green Co residents and officials were coming over the radio before we even made it home I was just THANKFUL.  My sister said that mom called her and told her when she spoke with me (while I was sitting in the storm with nowhere to go) that I was handling this all quite well.  I was.  I just kept reminding myself (even though I just had my car repainted!) that this is why I have insurance and that Starla and I were OK.  We even got out of it without any broken car windows unlike a lot of other people.  We were safe and in the end that was really all that mattered.  They had a tornado come through when my mom was little and one of her sisters (my aunt) actually got picked up by one and is still with us today!  I will try and remember to upload the video we took on the interstate later, don't have it with me at the moment.

April 27th-28th - This event already has a Wikipedia page!  That is just crazy!  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tornadoes_of_2011  Of course, this page is not fully updated and will continue to change.  That last streak we had like this I believe the news said was 1974 and even that when did not create the death toll that this past week did.  Over 342 was the last count released over 6 states.  Alabama, they were absolutely pounded by the fury of mother nature.  Greene Co, Tennessee (mind you, where Starla and I sat on the interstate just on the 8th) was hard hit in our area.  They are still cleaning up.  Everyone is still cleaning up in all 6 states and several are still doing "Recovery" and there are news posts of tons of "missing".  It has all just been crazy.  It catches everyone off guard here because Like I said, especially in the area I live in, this sort of thing just doesn't happen every season!  Lots of thoughts and prayers still going on in my heart and mind for ALL who are dealing with this.

His daddy doesn't allow his face on the internet but he is a doll!

April 30th started off with a beautiful morning at the park taking pictures of one of my most favorite little guys ever and with one of my most favorite people!  Good morning with Julie and Dawson and he did pretty good for a 2 year old at the park. He is a joy though.  I just adore him. The only kids I like more are Starla and Jeramy....LOL  After that I headed towards NC with John.  We ended up walking the gardens and trail at Biltmore, exploring a little of the old neighborhood and then decided to take the long drive home over the Blue Ridge Parkway.  It was nice.  Had not done that in ages and I grew up doing it every weekend with mom and dad so it was a nice day.

I love having this park so close to me!

Biltmore Gardens

May 1, 2011 (US)

US forces kill Osama bin Laden in Pakistan

'Justice has been done,' Obama says; 9/11 mastermind is buried at sea after deadly gunbattle"

Well now, this has clearly been a long time coming.  From the moment it was announced I have watched the posts on FB and read peoples comments, not saying too much on the matter.  I have a friend currently in the Middle East who will be leaving in another week or so headed for India.  I have another friend, hopefully, on their way here now.  They were in Dubai and headed this way but by the 20th will be heading straight back to the Middle East (using this loosely, I know, can't really give out a specific location).  I hope they both along with everyone else are safe as they travel.  There has been a lot of talk in regards to the US respecting the Religion of this man.  Without getting into religion it can be simply put that we are taught from a young age that "Two wrongs do not make a right".  I think that for us to stoop down to the level of our enemies does nothing but show we are no better than they are.  This is a pretty clear rule that we have learned at one time or another in our lives.  It is also a good thing to point out that in being respectful of that we are not out to enrage others just so we can behave like a bunch of jerks!  If you want to get all religious about it.  As Christians we are taught to love all of God's children.  That does not discriminate between race, sex, religion, region or anything else.  It is a simple and clear rule.  We are taught that it is not our place to judge others, that is God's place.  If we choose to be disrespectful of someone elses beliefs then you are not being very "Christian".  It goes to the whole being a hypocrite thing.  It is like "selective hearing", so many people chose to be "Christian" but only when it suits their current needs.  They have created "Selective Christianity". I would like to say that everyone's disrespectful outbursts will have no role in what the future now holds given this recent and long awaited news but I feel that more than ever it will not go as planned.  I guess only time will tell.  I have saw a few people that have spoken well in their response.  I will share what my friend Rita Davis posted with you as it is the one that resonates with me.

Freedom rings true! Hypocrisy.... sounds about the same. God bless the brave men and women who put their lives on the line for all of us, and may God bring true justice to light. I do not rejoice in someone's death, but in justice being served. I pray that in this instance - we will be thankful and somber at the events unfolding. None of us can correctly judge this man, situation or these people for eternity... let's keep that in mind - we will all stand before God at some point. But by Grace We Will Be Saved! Let's not be self righteous.

 I think that everyone truly needs to make more of an effort to be respectful of others.  I have a lot of friends with very different views in life.  Some are straight, some are gay, they are of all nationalities, some are true Christians and some don't believe.  I DO NOT Judge them based on these things.  It is simply not my place to.  I need to live my life within the boundaries I set for myself, not someone else.  I embrace all of my friends and all of their differences.  If I don't want someone telling me that I can't believe in GOD and I can't believe in loving whom ever it may be that I choose to love then I clearly have no right telling someone else.  They have the same right I have and if I expect them to respect mine I have to respect theirs as well.  In the end, for me, we are ALL children of GOD and it is his place, not ours.  I appreciate the eclectic group of people I have in my life and I learn something from all of them and in the end if they can learn something positive from me, I am happy with that.  If they were all just like me, well I would venture to say my back yard would be filled with holes 6' deep....LOL

My  mom just LOVES the word HYPOCRITE!  Ha ha ha.  I remember one day my brother using that word and mom turned and immediately asked for the definition of Hypocrite, when Brandon could not tell her he ended up writing the definition until he could never forget it!  LOL  Trust me, there is an upside to being the baby in the family.  The first time I told my mom that she "irked" me, I damn well knew the spelling and definition.  I knew better!  Gotta love my mom!

By the way mom, thanks for waking me up!  I call and check on mom every morning as I am driving to work so when I had not called and it was later than my normal time she called me.

I hear this wonderful song in my ear, I keep turning it down though because I am sleeping!  Finally I hear more lovely music in my ear and I pick up the phone and see mom's smiling face:

me:  grrrrr Hello!

mom:  what are you doing?

me:  I am laying here!

mom: Are you still asleep?!?

me: No, I am waking up....geeesh.....

mom: You are supposed to be at work! You overslept!

me: OH CRAP!

mom: You better call work!

bawhahahahahahahaha......Happy Monday Morning!

It is not sufficient to be worthy of respect 

in order to be respected. 

~ Alfred Nobel

Respect for ourselves guides our morals; 

respect for others guides our manners. 

~ Laurence Sterne

No update for now, just wanted to share something.  I know a number of people that will follow this blog because they deal directly with this situation on a daily basis.  I also think that this particular post of her's is a good ready for everyone!

http://koautism.blogspot.com/2011/04/friendship-in-2dfor-now.html

"Diversity is not about how we differ. 

Diversity is about embracing one another's uniqueness."

~ Ola Joseph

Busy, busy week.....

Nice day for a stroll

Gosh it has been a very busy week.  Geoff and the kids were here over the weekend.  I took some pics of the 3 of them but not on my camera so I don't have them to post yet.  We hung out, went to the park a bit and then to mom's to cook out for Mamaw's birthday (2nd) and Jeramy's 16th (4th) on Sunday with mom's family.  So it was a FULL weekend for sure!  Monday I had lunch with my good friend LL and did some catching up.  There is a lot to catch up on when you go from seeing one another daily (at work) to only 1 every couple weeks!  After that I went and finished painting at John's house.  It turned out pretty good if I do say so myself.  Monday evening we went to dinner for Jeramy's 16th with Misty, Josh, kids, Dad, Kim and Mom.  We had a good time and Jeramy was his entertaining self as usual.  Geeshh that kid is so funny.  I can't believe he is 16!!!!  I am still SMH every time I say it or even think it.  He will always be my "little" man though!  He is so wonderful!  Such an intelligent, witty, personable, respectable young man!  I am so proud of the young man he is becoming.  He brings light and laughs into everyone's life that has the pleasure of knowing him.  

Tuesday after work it was Karen's birthday so we 

all went to dinner, and would you know it the same place as Monday night...Outback.....HA HA  Dinner was good and entertaining.  Wednesday, now I was a little irate all day long for a number of reasons so I didn't do much once I got home.  Last night after work I grilled steaks (yes, fillet) and made baked potatoes, dinner was yummy and I just LOVE the smell of food cooking on the grill!!  I have been a little lacking in my snapshots, I am posting them but they have been a little "flat" this week.  I am thinking tomorrow I will grab my niece in the morning and drive off to Flag Pond.  Haven't been there before so we will see what we find.  Always up for a road adventure.   Sunday....well I am not sure where I am off to Sunday only that I will be gone.   HA HA  Monday, I will be working!  This will make my checkbook very happy!  It has been a little small lately....LOL

I am reading (yes mom, you read that correctly) Blue Like Jazz.  Now I read most of this back back in May of 07 but then moved on and never actually finished it.  I have decided to read it again starting from page 1.  I connect with so much of what this guy says it is crazy!  Anyhoo....that's my update for now.  More later I am sure.

"Everybody wants to be fancy and new.  Nobody wants to be themselves.  I mean, maybe people want to be themselves, but they want to be different, with different clothes or shorter hair or less fat.  It's a fact.  If there was a guy who just liked being himself and didn't want to be anybody else, that guy would be the most different guy in the world and everybody would want to be him."

~ Donald Miller

rens2011dailysnapshot.blogspot.com

 

Excuse my randomness but you may see a lot of it in the coming months.  :o)

(Seven Habits of Highly Successful People, bestselling author Stephen Covey says that Habit 2 is to “Begin with the End in Mind.”)

"I’d like you to imagine that you are about to attend one of the most important occasions of your life.

It will be held in a room sufficiently large to seat all of your friends, your family, your business associates - anyone and everyone to whom you are important and who is important to you.

Can you see it?

The walls are draped with deep golden tapestries. The lighting is subdued, soft, casting a warm glow on the faces of your expectant guests. The chairs are handsomely upholstered in a golden fabric that matches the tapestries. The golden carpeting is deeply piled.

At the front of the room is a dais, and on the dais a large, beautifully decorated table with candles burning at either end.

On the table, in the center, is the object of everyone’s attention. A large, shining, ornate box.
 

And in the box is … you! Stiff as the proverbial board.

Do you see yourself lying in the box, not a dry eye in the room?"

“Now, listen."

(Michael Gerber, The E-Myth Revisited)
(Michael Hyatt - Creating Your Personal Life Plan (free download http://michaelhyatt.com/life-plan)
What a profound thought.....

"fear is a manipulative emotion 

that can trick us into living a boring life."

~ Donald Miller

Saturday I took off to Sevierville for the afternoon/evening.  Picked up a few things and got some new tennis shoes.  Sunday I got up, tossed Gracie in the car, picked Starla up and headed off to walk at the dam.  After we walked we decided to drive on out that road (which I have never had a reason to do) but discovered if I stay on it and make one turn I will end up all the way on the other end of town....LOL   It was pretty though, a lot of farm land and that way.  Monday I got up and headed over to John's and put the 1st coat of red paint on the bathroom walls.  It was looking more orange so I decided to be funny and write on the walls with it and send him a picture....ha ha He then decided he was a little nervous.  No worries though all is well, it is all the same color now and looking for red since it dried.  I tore the skin off the top of my toe on the ladder and I am pretty sure I covered every single bad word in the book and maybe a few that are not in the book yet!  Made a makeshift band aid and kept on going.I went by to see a client and pick up some updates for her website and got 3 print orders in for the day so that was productive as well. Did a little laundry; which I need to finish tonight.  

he he he

this is a tight spot ppl!

looks more red (as it should)

  


























One of my clients made me giggle yesterday....(if you KNOW me you will know what this was in regards to)...she said "Oh by the way I met 'the daughter', oh my lord I just didn't know anyone could be so clueless.  I don't know how you deal with that so much?"   HA HA HA HA HA HA  She is so funny, right, but funny!

Ahhh here we are, another fun filled week........Well let's just not go that far.  I have so much to do this week and so many that seem to be on a mission to stave off my progress.  Another downfall of not working Monday's; there is always at least 2 additional messes you have to clean up on Tuesday.  Just had a guy be a total jerk on the phone, wait for his boss to leave the room and then start saying "I'm sorry, I am not a jerk, I don't like being this way.  I know you are stuck in the middle like me and it sucks!"  Ha ha ha well at least he can apologize for his behavior.  Most can't seem to do that.  I just don't get how some people can be so stinking incognizant.  Why bother?  On the upside - We are one day closer to Friday.  That has to be good!

The weekend ahead will be a busy one.  Mamaw has a birthday and Jeramy will be 16!  EEEEKKKKK  I can't believe he will be 16.  It is just crazy.  He is not even mine and I don't want him to drive.  It makes my stomach hurt just thinking about it.  Hopefully it will not be so rainy and yucky all weekend.  I may go paint some more at John's as well.  Mom has already decided he is next in line.  I have told her 10 times now to go buy her paint.....STILL WAITING!  I told her she better get a move on before I get out of the mood.....lol

Tick tock lady.....your time is running you!   he he he love you mom.

"Our patience will achieve more than our force."

~ Edmund Burke

No Guts, No Glory

A motto we should all live by, right?  It sounds simple; No Guts, No Glory.  

I have to say though I find more and more this is a motto lost on most these days.  I am guilty as well when it comes to just going for something.  I am always questioning the outcome and second guessing.  

On the simpler side though; No Guts, No Glory: Be Honest, Be Real, Stand Up for what you believe in; this is an area I really think more people need to work on.  My mother would tell you that on occasion I am too honest/too blunt but at the same time at least you know where you stand.  I mean it seems as though even with the simplest of tasks people just don't have the guts anymore.  Those that do absolutely get my respect for it without hesitation but I am just so not pleased with the lack of it I see these days.  

You have people running all over the top of one another, taking those they should be so very grateful for and tossing them aside like last weeks leftovers.  It is happening between friends, in relationships, in the workplace; it just seems never ending.

I had a friend that said yesterday they were so tired of being friends with people that don't put forth the effort yet do all the complaining.  So I say, it's time for spring cleaning.  I know I posted a blog on this March of last year (I think it was March).  You have these concerns and you worry about being that way, I get that, I really do.  In the long run though, those that matter, those that will do your life justice and vise versa, they will stand up.  Those that do not, well you will be better for it.  It takes some adjusting of course but it is a stress-er in your life that you don't need.  Let's face it, these days we can all use a little less stress in our lives.  Surround yourself with more supportive people rather than those that are always pulling you down.

If you have something to say, say it.  I mean really, you will never be able to please everyone and you will never be pleased by everyone.  (This is something I have worked on as well.)  It is just a simple fact of life so why spend so much time biting your tongue?  That same friend (spoken of in the prior paragraph); we are in some ways a lot alike and in others we are very different.  Here is the thing though, we respect that.  RESPECT, such a simple thing but so lost on so many as well.  I love that we are different.  We learn from one another and it all balances out.  I know I have said this before but if we were all the same it would be a very boring life.  I love that I learn something new every day from the people in my life.  I embrace it.  Not to say you wont all drive one another crazy from time to time but hey, it makes life interesting.

Anyhoo, just a few things I had on my mind.

It is your choice:    Step Up or Be Stepped On

"The only way to have a friend is to be one."

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

http://rens2011dailysnapshot.blogspot.com/

So, in continuing to be better at updating here is another update....LOL  I honestly can't recall what I did Friday.  Ha ha that is bad!  Must have been a lazy evening for sure!  Saturday I did a little around the house, cleaned out from under the kitchen sick when I discovered a leak and then took off to Turkey Creek.  It was a really pretty day and we ended up meeting up with Dad & Kim and Abuelos and having dinner and margaritas.  Sunday I got up and pulled weeds from the flower bed out front, pulled up all of the dead plants which don't come back and trimmed back the monkey grass out from so it will be all fresh and green.  I finally repotted the plan that has been sitting in my window sill since last summer!  LOL  Fingers crossed it doesn't die on me!   Dad came by and we worked on the kitchen sink and got the leak fixed and then we got really brave and fixed the leaky drain on the pedestal sink in the back bathroom.  We had really been avoiding this one but it was getting worse.  Have to pull that pedestal out made my stomach hurt.  If you don't know the story, to make it short, pedestal and sink were replaced twice before I moved in and the 2nd pedestal still didn't go in "unhamred"  LOL  Needless to see we both took deep breathes, I jokingly snapped before pictures and we slowly removed it, fixed the drain and slowly put it all back.  Shew....what a relief when that was over!  After that mom and I went and met John for lunch and then it was off to the grocery store.

http://rens2011dailysnapshot.blogspot.com/

Monday I got up and was out of the house by 8:30.  I went and painted (well primed for the dark color) John's bathroom.  He is terrified of painting for some reason.  ha ha  After I left there it was lunch time.  I got gas and went and picked up lunch and went by mom's.  We had lunch on the back porch and enjoyed the pretty day!  After lunch I went and picked up Starla.  The kids are on spring break this week.  She went with me and I washed the car, really washed it!  Then I cleaned out the inside and vacuumed it.  Wow...was it overdue for a cleaning for sure!  We finished up there and went by the house to get Gracie and it was off to the park.  The park was absolutely packed!  Everyone was taking advantage of the beautiful weather.  We walked for a while and wore Gracie out and then headed back home.  I was supposed to go to a music thing in Dandridge last night but once I got home and sat down the tired kicked in and I just didn't make it.  I started laundry which I need to finish tonight.

I still have all this stuff on my mind I am working to sort out.  Work is well, work.  There have been no major changes.  I feel like there are random doors here and there starting to open up but I don't feel that any of them are the "right" door but I guess whatever door I pass through I hope it leads me to the "right" one.  All of these people in my life choosing to share so much right now; oddly that seems to be continuing just a bit.  Not sure about how I will sort all of that out but I am trying to figure that out.  My mom asked me for something.  Although I recall some comments I don't recall the formal question but she says it was in November.  Either way I have a feeling she is just not going to get what she wants and I don't know how to change that.  I guess only time will tell.  I would love to not let her down but some things are just easier said than done.  I just don't know.

Anyway, it seems to be about lunch time here which is good because I am just realizing I am starving!  LOL  I hope that everyone has a good week and that I can start un-cluttering my mind!  My body & mind need serious rest they are not getting because of all the clutter!

Hope everyone's week is off to a good start!

"I believe that anyone can conquer fear by doing the things he fears to do, provided he keeps doing them until he gets a record of successful experience behind him. "

~Eleanor Roosevelt

Ok so I am going to try and do better on my postings.  My last post was a lot to catch up on and a lot to read so maybe if I am better at the updates it wont be so overwhelming...LOL  

Let's see last weekend was a little hectic to say the least.  I cleaned all night Friday night.  Well I had cleaned out closets and tossed all this stuff on the guest bed with the intentions of trying it on and having a keep pile and a toss pile.  Well I decided to change my ways, if I could not remember the last time I wore it, it went straight to the TOSS pile!   Needless to say I ended up with a BIG toss pile but when all was said and done my guest room was clean once again and I was exhausted.  Saturday morning I got up and went with my friend John to look at  stuff for his house.  He bought a house and has not started buying furniture or anything yet!  Well I thought he was going to by like towels, pictures, ya know that sort of thing.  Nope, we decided he was going to replace the sink and cabinet in the small bath and paint the walls (a good color but none the less not what I would have thought he would pick) and everything.  Of course, now he has decided on a color, tore the sink and cabinet out and now I think is scratching his head wondering "WTH was I thinking".  Ha ha I understand as well as anyone this can all be overwhelming.  Of course I tackled and entire house before I moved in to it so I suggested one room at a time would be a good route.  We will see how it goes...LOL  After that I went straight back to the house and started dinner as I had company coming.  Saturday evening I did have to deal with one of those "situations" from my previous post.  Geesh, it was more difficult to deal with than I had thought but at the same time I knew it was necessary so you do what you have to do.  It was heartbreaking though without going into details that is the best way to put it; heartbreaking.  It has been a long week as far as that goes but I just have to have faith that in the end it will all be OK.  Some things just have to happen and you have to hope for the best.  I am hoping.  I had another that I think felt a little "brushed off" and that was totally my fault so I have done my best to address that as well and hopefully it will all work out fine as well.

Sunday I got up, made breakfast, visited a bit.  Then it was time to bake a cake and head off to mamaw's for Donna & Darla's birthday lunch.  Everything was good and the day went smoothly which I was very grateful for.  The cake was super yummy, I just wished I had saved more for myself....HA HA!  Monday I was busy, busy it seemed.  I had some appoints spread through the day and such so the day went by pretty quickly!  This week has been a long week at work but thankfully today is Friday!  I have been at this same place for 9 years today, crazy to think that.  

Before ( * iPod pics so  not the clearest)

So I decided Tuesday it was time to get my hair trimmed and I was seeing one too many greys when I looked in the mirror each day so I called and made a hair appointment.  Around 10pm or so Wed night I decided I would try going back to red.  Of course I had a color in mind but my hair has been DARK for like 6+  years so it is going to take some effort to get to that exact stage I am looking for.  Of course, it just randomly worked out that I went red for St. Patrick's Day so I thought what better day!   LOL  When I just look in the mirror it is odd to me I don't see that much of a change in the color but side by side the color difference is much more clear.  Back in 97' (after my mother had accidentally made me a blonde!) I went to "ruby red" it was quite bold and I adjusted it a bit but then I kept the red for quite sometime.  Who knows, I could have the same hair in 6 weeks or totally different again....we shall see.   ;o)

After ( * iPod pics so  not the clearest)

 I have really made no major plans for this weekend although I do think I am going to just take some quite time.  No cleaning, no drama, none of that stuff.  I do have some web work that I need to get done but I will spread it out.  Saturday afternoon I think I may be going to Knoxville to do a couple things.  Anyway, there is a brief update on the past week so hopefully I will continue to do better at updating this year!

"He seemed to be talking about my fears, my insecurity, and my unwillingness to see what was wonderful because tomorrow it might disappear and I might suffer. 

The gods throw the dice, and they don't ask whether we want to be in the game or not."

~Paulo Coelho

I have been a bad blogger so far in March.....

Gosh....I just don't know where to start.  Things have been sort of crazy lately and if it is not one thing it is another.  I keep saying I am going to update my blog and I always get side tracked.  I did make some "goals" for the new year; rather than "resolutions".  Some I have been doing well with, some I have scratched the surface with and some are still to come. Rome wasn't built in a day people!

One of my goals was to do my Daily Snapshot; yes, daily!  So far I have not missed a single day.  Each snapshot is from the day of posting of just within a few days.  That was part of my goal.  I thought, I enjoy my photography and I enjoy seeing new things so it was a good way to force me out of the house.  Now, I will be honest, there have been a couple pictures snapped from the comfort of my pj's & my car!  Hey, even when I was sick I made my self get out!  We are not even through the 1st quarter of the year but I am happy with myself that I have kept it up so far.

Another goal was to start getting back to the old me.  The one that did not worry so much about what everyone else thinks.  That is a downfall of living in a small town for sure!  Every which way you turn, no matter what you are doing or not doing you are being judged.  Not like you are not judged every where, all the time but I guess in a small town there is only so much for people with no life of their own to do than to nose in everyone's life but their own.  I have done a lot of biting my tongue as to not hurt the feelings of others despite the fact that very often they hurt mine.  I had become so "nice" that it was starting to wear me down.  So I have done well with that goal.  There are areas I still need to improve on but I am moving right along.  I mean let's be realistic here; biting one's tongue only works until there is nothing left to bite!

The advice I have given those around me:  If you don't want to know the TRUTH, Please do not ask me because that is what you are going to get.  I will put it as nicely as possible until pushed too far but none the less the truth will come out.  One of us may wind up face first in the mud but that is just part of it!

I also made a goal to do more things this year that in past years for whatever reason I had not done.  Mostly simple things; things that may seem trivial to others but of course that is why they are my goals and not yours. HA!   I did not even make a list really, I figured I would know them as they happened.  I mean really simple.  I took myself to the movies (yes. me, myself & I. Not sure my sister believed that one at first).  No this is not major earth-shattering even but none the less it is something I never would have done in the past.  I enjoyed it; I will be doing it again I am positive.  It was in the middle of a Monday too, there were only a couple other people in the movie I was watching, it was peaceful.  I loaded up my dog a couple Mondays ago and we took a hike.  Nope, not a walk in the park or around the blog.  We actually set out on a hiking trail, spent some time sitting out on the rocks at the edge of the lake on a comfortable breezy day.  It was WONDERFUL!  It was so peaceful so relaxing.  Again not earth-shattering but something I would have never done before.  I am not a very trusting person so I tend to stay on paths that follow the roads or stay out in the open, I don't tend to venture off like that alone.  I took a painting class one Friday night with a group of friends and new friends in Knoxville.  Not something I would have really jumped to do in the past but I LOVE IT!  I was a little nervous about it, I am outgoing when you get to know me but to be honest I am not big on meeting new people.  Again though, love it!  I would do it again for sure!  I broke out a sketch book.  I have not done that since I was in maybe freshman/sophomore year of high school!  I have always had a creative side but somewhere over the years I have lost touch with it.  So there are just a few of the changes I have made so far....not all of them but I can only write about so many at once......I am making up for lost time here!  LOL

I met up with a very sweet old friend of mine, Amy Reece Spahr, for dinner one night in NC.  We had not seen one another for 16 years!  It was so great!  I am so glad I drove the little way after work that Friday to be able to see her and catch up!

February - WOW - February was a strange month for me.  It was filled with a lot of stress, a lot of ups and downs, a lot of emotions.  February was literally a month of connections for me.  Some old, some new and maybe some still to be?  Not for sure on that one.  I mean something was seriously in the air last month with the people in my life.  I have to read back over emails and replay conversations in my head really trying to take it all in.  I do have to say that I was just really taken back by some of it.  Left a little speechless in some situations.  (ha ha hold the comments on me being speechless)  I mean what is it in people that years later...some over 13 years later finally deciding to email me, call me, tell me all these things all at once.  I am still unsure how to handle some it or what to think of it.  Some I am unsure about, some I feel maybe I should have given more response to but had they known how much I was having thrown at me and from how many directions out of the blue; maybe they would understand my lack of response.  One can only hope.  Gosh, one person told me everything you would ever want to hear(and good lord it was sincere); I did a lot of crying, a lot; of course there is such a thing as too late.  I mean the ship only holds anchor for so long, there comes a time when it sails.  Sometimes, eventually, it may make it's way back around to where it once was but sometimes....it sets off on a one-way course.  We simply can't always control things in life we just have to go with the waves, navigate the best we can and pray we don't sink along the way!

Clearly it has been a stressful few weeks and last Friday at work was very trying.  My sweet niece Starla (13 yrs) decided while out shopping Saturday morning she wanted to get me something to make me smile.  So she picked something out to buy with her own money but only had enough money for one thing so she put back what she had gotten for herself and bought me a gift.  She was so excited to bring it straight to me she called on their way home.  It was so sweet and made me smile for sure!  Even when my family can drive me insane I always know how very blessed I am to have them.  I love them all!

Most of you know work has been stressful for me since the fall.  I have been working on improving that situation.  Things don't happen over night. There are days I am ready to just give up and continue to tough it out (sort of like when your drop a rock down the well and you feel you could sit there for days and never here it hit) and other days I feel a little better about there being a light at the end of the tunnel.  I am trying to manage that stress.  I am trying to find different ways that work for me.  I have actually went to bed earlier a few days this week and last night I never once turned my laptop on once I got home!  I can honestly say I don't recall the last time that happened.

My web design business is gradually starting to get more calls.  Things got a little quite for a while and I was starting to get concerned.  I have met with 2 potential new clients already in March and have my fingers crossed that will all work out.  I have 2 ads coming out in the new Yellow Pages phone book in April so I am excited about that and hoping that it brings in some new connections as well.

So, I guess that is a bunch of catching up for one post!  LOL  A busy evening and weekend ahead for me.  I will be keeping my thoughts and prayers going for:

all of those affected by early hour events in Japan, as well as those still in the path of mother nature's fury.

my former schoolmate Gary Owenby who's house burned down this past week

Jennifer Dunlap who's father lost his battle with Cancer this past week

Gray Rice who once again is facing his own battle with Cancer, I have faith he will beat it!

my sweet friend Amy Reece Spahe who is once again on her way to the M.E. on her journey to share her love of Christ with the world

and of course thoughts and prayers for all of those in my life!  

"Every child is an artist. 

The problem is how to remain an artist once he grows up." 

 

~  Pablo Picasso (1881 - 1973)